How do you get kids to do something?
Tell them not to do it.
What car is the perfect size for mice?
Why do vampires make terrible police officers?
What's a vegetable's favorite game to play?
Wanna hear a joke about paper?
What do you call George Washington's birthday?
Why is your lawyer such a smart guy?
What do you call two birds stuck together?
What did the goat, cow, duck, and pig all call each other?
What does a spy do when he gets cold?
What did the shower say to the toilet?
Why did the calf hate his school picture?
Imagine you're in a room with no windows and no doors, how do you get out?
What did the snake name his daughter?
What did the baby chick say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
On Thanksgiving, what does Dad have in common with a baseball player?
Why are the chicks hatched at Easter always so creative?
How long did the baseball player stay at the library?
Where do termites go camping?
Why do lawyers always go to Japanese restaurants?
What kind of dogs do the best at the Olympic® winter games?